With Gus away, I realize he is our engine. He moves us. Now he's gone, I can't think what to do, how to decide what to do.

Jake and Tucker engaged each other all day. Sufficient unto themselves. Jake's confidence slowly unfurling. This evening he jumped onto the bed, arms flung out, declaring: "Have no fear, Jacob's here." Downright flamboyant. It's going to be good for them to get to know each other in the stillness of Gus' absence.

It occurs to me that most families must be like this, most families are not Gus-driven.